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‘Edible Anus’ makes chocolate out of your butthole mold for this Valentine!
February 12 2019, 1:55 PM
In case you want someone to eat your butt?

Sit down, strap in, and get ready, people. This one is a doozy. A new company called Edible Anus (yes… Edible Anus) is here to make your dreams come true. That is if your dreams are eating a chocolate mold of your significant other’s butthole.

In case  your dreams are eating a chocolate mold of your significant other’s butthole.

For the reasonable price of $38.95 (this could have been $3,000 and I might still have considered that reasonable for someone having to be putting chocolate on your asshole), Edible Anus will mail you five boxes of white, milk and dark chocolate anuses.

It’s price is very reasonable, for $38.95 

According to legend, or rather, real life, the company’s founder Magnus Irvin (who looks like the mad scientist version of Jim Broadbent) didn’t have the easiest time inventing his chocolate assholes. According to Irvin, the first time, “I poured the stuff in me bum and it all run past me nuts into me face.”

Well that’s a mental image.

The box it arrives in is shockingly classy, actually.

It looks like it could be jewelry or French macarons.

According to the company’s website, “The Edible Anus first saw the light of day in 2006 when the London artist, Magnus Irvin, made a range of them in multi-colored chocolate to present in an exhibition. It was at the ensuing show that he met and formed a partnership with Mr. Ritzema, a tall man of Dutch descent. Since then the two of them have worked together to make the range of products available today.

Initially, Mr. Irvin tried to cast his own anus with messy and disastrous results. Whilst explaining his failure to a chance acquaintance at a bus stop he was gratified to find that his fellow bus passenger was willing to allow him to cast her anus. The job was done in just over half an hour later that afternoon and all subsequent anuses have been based on this casting. It is a matter of interest that the person who kindly donated her service has no idea that her anus has now gone global.”

It is a matter of interest that the person who kindly donated her service has no idea that her anus has now gone global.

“The chocolate, glass and metal anuses have since appeared in other exhibitions and some of the more unusual high street retailers, whilst the chocolate anus has been bought by decerning customers the world over. Rings of succulent chocolate lovingly cast and crafted from the delectable posterior of our stunning butt model. This luxury chocolate is unique and manufactured entirely in the UK. Watch Grandma’s face light up as she unwraps a homely selection of chocolate cracks. The perfect gift for all the family.

Bustin’ taboos since 2002. We believe the Edible Anus can help to break down cultural boundaries or race, class, gender, and sexual orientation in an amusing and easily digestible way.”

We can get on board with that!

But (butt?) let’s cut to the chase. We know you want to know how the chocolates are made.

First, a mold must be made of the client’s nether regions.

First, a mold must be made of the client’s nether regions.

To do this, dentist putty is applied to the anus. Then, the putty is set into clay and silicone to make the mold.

Chocolate is then poured into the mold and left to set.

But for some, chocolate isn’t fancy enough…

While chocolate expires, gold and bronze are forever.

For those people, you can have a butthole cast in gold or bronze. While chocolate expires, gold and bronze are forever.

Source: twentytwowords

Thaopham

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